And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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