sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Girls should come with a carfax report
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
