If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
