Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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