So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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