Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Don't tell me you're on acid again
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
