jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
3pm strippers are depressing
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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