Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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