white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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