i would punch a child for taco bell
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
