I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
