Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
