Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
