dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
