so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
even my farts smell like vagina
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
The struggles of a small town man whore
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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