bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Me too!
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
