ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I need help removing her.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize