she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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