Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
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