He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
