I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Randomize
