Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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