Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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