so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize