is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
