What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
