I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
