so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Even my vagina gasped.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
