I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize