she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I am never drinking with the goths again.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Randomize
