I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
