So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize