we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
