Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize
