My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize
