i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Randomize
