butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
