the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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