You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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