I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
