turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
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