Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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