My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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