dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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