Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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