there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
