I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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