no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
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