He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
