it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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