yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
