chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
